BAND 7.5 IELTS ESSAY SAMPLE: TECHNOLOGICAL ADVANCEMENTS - COMPLICATION OR EFFICIENCY?
Explore an IELTS essay sample on the implications of technological advancements. This Band 7.5 essay discusses views both for and against technology, highlighting benefits like easier access to online learning and medical advancements, along with the challenges faced by the older and less-privileged population. Perfect resource for IELTS aspirants to understand argumentative writing.
Writing Task
Some people argue that technological advancements have made our lives more complicated rather than simpler. Others, however, believe that these advancements have made our lives easier and more efficient. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Support your answer with relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
IELTS Writing Sample Essay with Band 7.0 Scoring and Feedback
In today's digital era, the benefits and drawbacks of technological advancements have sparked an intense debate. Some argue that it complicates our lives, while on the other hand, the rest state that it makes our daily lives more efficient. However, both views have their justifications that must be taken into consideration.
On the one hand, technological advancement complicates our lives through a high level of up-front instructions and digital transformation requirements. To operate well, users are demanded to understand the unprecedented instructions before technology usage. The demand will be particularly difficult, especially for the older-age and less-knowledgeable populations. Moreover, certain applications require higher technological specifications that are more expensive and limited. Additionally, mandatory digitalization such as online learning access and electronic ID card often pose a burden to underprivileged citizens due to economic difficulties.
However, some people benefit more from technological advancements. The rapidly-growing digitalization enables easier access to online learning, especially during the previous pandemic. Online learning has enabled through-screen communication across geographical gaps, providing a more efficient way to study from anywhere. Moreover, technological advancements made futuristic innovation come to life. It enabled robotic surgery and genetic editing to tackle difficult situations in the medical field.
Personally, I would say that the benefits of technology outweigh its drawbacks. Although adaptations are required prior to its utilization, scientific innovation will serve and ease our lives better in the long term. As a student and researcher in a rapidly-growing field, technology has facilitated easier access to scientific findings. Moreover, it allows users to build a global range of connections and collaborations that will benefit our country in multiple aspects, such as medicine, politics, the economy, and many more.
Therefore, the benefits and drawbacks of technological advancements differ depending on each person's perspective. Although the older-age and less-privileged populations may have difficulties in operating the system, the advantages of technological utilization cannot be undermined. Mandatory digitalization such as online learning, electronic ID card, and electronic payment are considered more effective approaches compared to manual ones. Hence, it is important to regulate its utilization to optimize its benefit to all-range of the population. This goal can be approached from governmental action to enable better access to the technology for the targeted groups.
Words: 370|Paragraphs: 5
Submitted: 7/19/2023, 05:27 AM
Coherence And Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource7.0
Grammatical Range7.0
Task Achievement7.0
GRADED
7.0
Coherence and Cohesion:How well the essay is organized and how well ideas are connected throughout.7.0
Lexical Resource:The range of vocabulary used and how accurately and appropriately it is used.7.0
Grammatical Range:The range and accurate use of grammar structures.7.0
Task Achievement:How well the essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a fully developed response.7.0
Band Score:7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7
Logical structure7
Introduction & conclusion present7
Supported main points7
Accurate linking words7
Variety in linking words7
Lexical Resource7
Varied vocabulary7
Accurate spelling & word formation7
Grammatical Range7
Mix of complex & simple sentences7
Clear and correct grammar7
Task Achievement7
Complete response7
Clear & comprehensive ideas7
Relevant & specific examples7
Appropriate word count7