BAND 6.5 IELTS ESSAY SAMPLE: TECHNOLOGICAL ADVANCEMENTS IMPACT ON THE PRESERVATION OR EROSION OF CULTURAL TRADITIONS
Explore this band 6.5 score IELTS essay sample discussing the impact of technological advancements on preserving culture and traditions. Understand varied opinions on the role of tech devices in forgetting or maintaining historical values. Dive into the interplay of culture, traditions and technology now.
Writing Task
Some people argue that technological advancements have led to the loss of traditional values and cultural practices, while others believe that technology has helped preserve cultures and traditions. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Please support your response with specific examples and relevant reasons.
IELTS Writing Sample Essay with Band 6.0 Scoring and Feedback
Varied opinions have been put on the table when it comes to the impact of technology-driven devices on the culture. Although some argued that hi-tech advancements cause to people forget everything about their history and culture, other individuals believe that technology advancements would have merits to preserve their cultures and traditions. I will discuss this more in detail in paragraphs to come and explain whether I agree or disagree at the end.
To begin with, no one can deny the fact that traditional values and cultural practices are integral parts of people's lives. individuals can show themselves by exploring in their backgrounds. A country could rely on its traditions. If a society does not have a reliable values, it would not have a good country for living. Technology advancements, say, Internet, smartphone and so on, just only show traditional events or cultural practices only by some images or short-videos, which cannot preserve cultures in the best way.
An alternative position argues that thanks to the technology, people can see some promotions to gain knowledge about their historical culture too, which can absorb people to have a better idea about their background cultures. For instance, they are being conditioned to search on the Internet in advance. After getting familiar with that place, they will go to the museum or another places to show them virtually.
After looking at both different views, although some people prefer to remove the technological advancements due to lose their traditional values, others prefer stay in use technology-driven devices to save their values. Thus, heightened benefits of technology that focus on showing traditions and values can clearly be seen.
Words: 272|Paragraphs: 1
Submitted: 7/22/2023, 08:50 AM
Coherence And Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range6.0
Task Achievement6.0
GRADED
6.0
Coherence and Cohesion:How well the essay is organized and how well ideas are connected throughout.6.0
Lexical Resource:The range of vocabulary used and how accurately and appropriately it is used.6.0
Grammatical Range:The range and accurate use of grammar structures.6.0
Task Achievement:How well the essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a fully developed response.6.0
Band Score:6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6
Logical structure6
Introduction & conclusion present6
Supported main points6
Accurate linking words6
Variety in linking words6
Lexical Resource6
Varied vocabulary6
Accurate spelling & word formation6
Grammatical Range6
Mix of complex & simple sentences6
Clear and correct grammar6
Task Achievement6
Complete response6
Clear & comprehensive ideas6
Relevant & specific examples6
Appropriate word count6