BAND 6.5 IELTS ESSAY SAMPLE: CAUSES AND SOLUTIONS FOR YOUTH UNEMPLOYMENT CRISIS
Explore the challenges faced by fresh graduates in securing stable jobs in our IELTS Band 6.5 essay sample. Dive into the root causes of these issues, from companies' increasing demand for highly-qualified staff to the financial concerns of the youth. Also, discover potential solutions such as apprenticeships and financial aid for new graduates. Gain insights into career preparation during university education for easier transition into the job market.
Writing Task
In many countries, young people are finding it difficult to secure stable employment after completing their education. What do you think are the main causes of this issue, and what measures can be taken to address the problem? Provide relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge to support your answer.
IELTS Writing Sample Essay with Band 6.0 Scoring and Feedback
It is believed that youngsters are struggling with finding a permanent job after their graduation from university. In this essay, reasons for this issue will be analyzed and persuasive solutions will be provided as well.
To begin with, in the recent times, most of the companies are likely to employ high qualified staff, which can be considered as the foremost reason of why fresh graduates are challenging to find a stable job. In other words, since those youngsters ,who have completed university recently, do not acquired considerable skill related to their field of study and work, are not the first option for companies to be hired. Working in most companies require a convenient qualification. Moreover, financial stability and income is the second significant reason. Due to the fact that the majority of young people prefer to work in a place with high salary than low wages. Furthermore, these fresh graduates, who might have some university loans, demand for jobs which can briefly make their living easier.
Working as an apprentice, is one of the probable solutions to the aforementioned problem. In fact, in this situation, they have this opportunity to master their required skills, so consequently they will find their appropriate job. In addiction, companies and governments should provide some subsidies for new graduates in order to support them financially during their working life. To illustrate, a company can fund quiet subvention box for these youngsters.
To sum up,although salary and income should be examined as the most significant young people's concern, it is highly dependent on companies to pay them adequately. On the other hand, in my point of view, students should enroll on some courses so as at the end of their education, they have mastered those essential and principal skills.
Words: 293|Paragraphs: 1
Submitted: 7/24/2023, 01:12 PM
Coherence And Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range5.0
Task Achievement6.0
GRADED
6.0
Coherence and Cohesion:How well the essay is organized and how well ideas are connected throughout.6.0
Lexical Resource:The range of vocabulary used and how accurately and appropriately it is used.6.0
Grammatical Range:The range and accurate use of grammar structures.5.0
Task Achievement:How well the essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a fully developed response.6.0
Band Score:6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6
Logical structure6
Introduction & conclusion present6
Supported main points6
Accurate linking words6
Variety in linking words6
Lexical Resource6
Varied vocabulary6
Accurate spelling & word formation6
Grammatical Range5
Mix of complex & simple sentences5
Clear and correct grammar5
Task Achievement6
Complete response6
Clear & comprehensive ideas6
Relevant & specific examples6
Appropriate word count6