BAND 5.5 IELTS ESSAY SAMPLE: EXPLORING THE RISING CRIME RATES AND SOLUTIONS GLOBALLY
Explore our IELTS essay sample that scores 5.5. Dive into the discussion on the impact of negative news coverage on society, from emotional effects to informative benefits. Understand how to construct effective arguments for your IELTS essay through this in-depth example.
Writing Task
In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
IELTS Writing Sample Essay with Band 5.5 Scoring and Feedback
The tendency of news reports in the media to focus on problems and emergencies than on positive developments is harmful to the individuals and the society as a whole.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, the news stream of the world would rather cover more negative news and emphasize on the problematic conditions than positive one which is not to the best of the community. In my opinion, I agree that news producers opt for broadcasting negative words but this does not mean that it is consistently to the worst of the society.
In my opinion, exposure to negative news and doom scrolling can be along with detrimental effects on the soul of the people. For example, learning about occurrence of a terror, a plane crash and a bank robbery would make people consider themselves being in the same situation which can develop emotional and effective conditions like depression, anxiety and trauma. These conditions may result in changes in individuals’ mood affecting their relationships with others and in the long run debilitate them physically. It can, therefore, be said that constant exposure to the latest events of the world does not necessarily lead to sheer awareness of the incidents, it has some unwanted ramifications as well.
However, I do not believe that we should be ignorant of the informative and educational aspects of news, even if it is negative. For example, during outbreak of Corona virus worldwide one of the items which was in the shortlist of all news bulletins was raising information about the disease and how to avoid being infected in spite of its seemingly negative content. Also, when the vaccine was discovered and distributed among countries individuals must have known about vaccination centers via news. As well as this, in the case of being hit by an earthquake or flood, people could understand about the muster points or safe areas by listening to news.
In conclusion, despite wide coverage of the negative news by news makers which is not to useful for the society in terms of their personality health, I do not reckon we should ignore all news items due to their doom contents.
Words: 361|Paragraphs: 3
Submitted: 7/23/2023, 11:00 AM
Coherence And Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range6.0
Task Achievement5.0
GRADED
5.5
Coherence and Cohesion:How well the essay is organized and how well ideas are connected throughout.5.5
Lexical Resource:The range of vocabulary used and how accurately and appropriately it is used.6.0
Grammatical Range:The range and accurate use of grammar structures.6.0
Task Achievement:How well the essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a fully developed response.5.0
Band Score:5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Logical structure5
Introduction & conclusion present5
Supported main points5
Accurate linking words6
Variety in linking words6
Lexical Resource6
Varied vocabulary6
Accurate spelling & word formation6
Grammatical Range6
Mix of complex & simple sentences6
Clear and correct grammar6
Task Achievement5
Complete response5
Clear & comprehensive ideas5
Relevant & specific examples5
Appropriate word count5